A friend in need is a friend indeed goes the old proverb, and how true this is. Need however is not always material, in fact, it could be safe to say that most of our friendships were founded and have continually been built on us just being there for our friends. It is presence that mattered and still matters the most, when it comes to genuine friendship. Anything else you extend is simply an expression of the love and appreciation you have for this friend.
It is also true that needs will keep changing with the endless flow of time, accompanied by the quickly shifting seasons of life. One such monumental season is marriage. The sound of a friend getting married will be met with joy, celebration and of course for the loved and dear one you just want nothing short of the very best for them.
As a trusted friend, it naturally goes without saying that in these times, you will be needed to walk with your friend, encourage and support them. This period is normally marked with lots of anxiety, pressure, both internal and external, sometimes even episodes of panic especially closer to the wedding date. It is a great time to really come through for a friend, whether she is the bride, or he is the groom to be.
And so, how about we try make it easy for you by listing ways through which you can be there for a friend during their wedding planning process?
A listening ear and a shoulder to cry on sounds like just the perfect place to start. Emotions run high during the wedding planning process, tears may fall, sometimes out of joy but before the joy however, it may just fall out of utter frustration. What your friend really needs in this season is a someone they can call when they feel overwhelmed, overburdened and even weary.
On some days they may just want to pour their heart out when that delivery is delayed and the provider is being outrightly unreasonable, or when that vendor is refusing to be flexible on necessary changes that need to be made, etcetera. Sometimes, it can also be that family has made demands that are just impossible to meet and the bride to be or groom, is needing a listening ear and perhaps wisdom to handle the matter or matters. These seemingly small things can bring sanity to a friend.
While grooms may not shed tears, at least in people’s view, or vent out their frustrations audibly, they will sure need that one person to accompany them emotionally, and sense when they are strained or stressed, so that they can determine the necessary steps to support their friend. They could engage them activities like taking a hike, mountain bike riding or just watching a football match, to take their minds off any looming pressure. This is moral support, and it will come in handy in these times of planning a wedding.
Now don’t get us wrong. We are not talking about or demanding for military trained officers but simply, a heart that is sensitive toward a friend. The essence of this is so that you become their antennas to detect any looming threat to their peace of mind. Your role as your friends’ defense is to be on the lookout for any situation that is threatening to get out of hand, or prematurely to their ears with a possibility of destabilizing their state of mind or their wedding planning process. The idea is that you should be in a position to help prevent or avert the situation, of course getting support from other friends or family with the same agenda as you. It is easier said than done but, it truly is helpful to be this person to a friend.
As one who is walking with your friend you need to try and be a few steps ahead. Be the one to mention what they may be needing up ahead either in terms of planning or preparation of the wedding. There can be many blanks in the minds of the ones getting married. Sometimes due to the overwhelming emotions, and the demand on their time to be in various places, it is easy to forget important things that need to be attended to by the couple. As a trusted friend you can think ahead for them, of course while consulting so that everything is aligned, and no important actions are missed. Be the one to think of the next steps when they are clueless.
Hand in hand with being a step ahead is to remember the minutest of details. You can take initiative to have a notebook detailing information or actions that can easily be forgotten. Follow through your list for it is one thing to have well written notes, and yet another to follow through the notes and with the necessary actions.
Finally, who will not appreciate a friend who is able to willingly and lovingly support them with finances. It will absolutely go a long way if you can support your friends financially during this period. You can directly contribute to the wedding budget kiti, or identify a specific need requiring funds that you can go ahead to cater for. Either way, monetary support in essential to a wedding planning process and any good friend would be happy to see their friend not stuck if they could do something about it.
We all depend on a power higher than us. For the Christian, you know that for anything in your life to stand it needs a solid foundation who is Christ Jesus. How you keep in tune is through prayers. As a friend be the prayer partner your friend needs; whether it has been asked of you or not. Encourage them with words of scripture and continually pray for and with them.
In conclusion, these are not to be just pretty ideas on paper but real steps that you can confidently take towards supporting a friend who is getting married neither should you feel confined to this list. Chances are that along the way, you may just discover emerging needs that will require you to support your friend and do just that. Yours is to take initiative and be the friend you would love someone else to be for you, whether in similar circumstances or different from this.